Quotes from parents of my students
Parent Hi Ms. M., are you having a black history month party?
Me: No we will be having a small celebration honor valentines day and february birthdays on the 15th
Parent: Well, I am black
Me: ( thinking, yes i can see that) yes well you are welcome to have a black history month party at your house. I prefer to honor the cultures of all people throughout the year and not just in particular month
I am not sure if I handled this situation appropriately or not but I did refrain from saying my first though which appears in parenthesis above so i think that is a good thing. While I welcome parents thoughts and suggestions and I do strive for a partnership with parents, I felt annoyed after this conversation
Parent: (calling on the phone from another country) Hi, uh yes my daughter hasnt been receiving her special education services while we are here.
Me: *mouth wide open, speechless at this audacity
she chose to take her child out of the country and out of school for over three weeks time and has nerve to call and ask about her child receving special education services from our school district while they are there. hey dont get me wrong, I would certainly fly to this warmer location if it was paid for by my district. But me leaving for three weeks is not fair to the other students who are actually at school. And lets be realistic, our district doesn't have money to consistently supply necessities like soap and paper towels, and these days, heat. They certainly are not going to be sending me to another country to work with one child for a few weeks. After this conversation, i thought that the request was outrageous. But then maybe its a good thing that the parent cares enough about her child to want her not to be further behind by this absence. but on the other hand, this absence was something that the mother chose so its tough to make up my mind on the overall feeling
and one final interaction with a parent from the last few weeks
me: Hi Mr. H, I am glad that you are here. I actually have wanted to talk to you about your son. Have you noticed any differences in his behavior over the last few days?
parent: no why?
me: well he have seen some differences in the classroom in the way that he is responding to the teachers and interacting with his pe...
parent: MAN WHAT IS IT WIth you teachers? i was called to the school yesterday for his sister
Usually his kid is an angel who spends most of the day polishing a halo. but prior to this conversation, there had been two really difficult days. so everyone is entitled to an off day, but at the end of the second day, i had planned to call his house anyway to touch base with them but his father happened to come by. there could have been a million reasons for the changes in behavior:
the kid had a tooth ache
the kids was about to get sick or getting over a sickness
he was tired/hungry/cold
something had upset him either at home or at school
and the list goes on...
i was not intending to point fingers or accuse the parent, but simply make him aware. it is difficult to provide information, real information based on observations, daily interactions and other data to parents without upsetting them. i always think " well if it were my kid I would want to know. I would want the teacher to tell me" But i have the sense that some parents are coming into the conversation from a different perspective. perhaps because of their own negative experiences in school. perhpas because of stress in the home or workplace. Perhaps because things are difficult with the child at home and they cant take any more bad news. I dont know. i do know that I must futher work on my communication so that I am not offending the very people I am trying to get information from
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1 comment:
w-o-w wow... You have the patience of a saint. It is a good thing I did not become a teacher.
i think you handled the black history month convo. quite well, quite diplomatically.
How is it o.k. to take your child who has special needs out of school for three weeks? Is there anything the principal could have done about this? I know that the school my mom works in strongly suggests that families take their vacations during a scheduled school vacation or summer break...It is going to be quite a transition for all involved when the child comes back... I'm sorry.
Parents are rather irrational. WShat does Mr. H mean by "you teachers". Automatically the defect is with the teacher and not him or his children or something going on outside of school? Maybe if you could get him to stop spouting off long enough to listen you could calmly explain to him that you are not sure what is causing the change in behavior, but you would like to work together with him for theb etterment of the child... though you might want to use smaller words since he seems well... you get the jist...
Bless you...honestly...
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